Anthony decided to go to a party.

Anthony must have drank an awful lot, because he's missing some time.

Anthony met Vinnie, a charismatic voice on the radio, and everything went horribly, horribly wrong.

Only If is currently available cheap as free on Steam, which is awfully nice, considering that it's easily one of the most effective mindfuck video games in history. Combining the down-the-rabbit-hole insanity of The Stanley Parable with a much, much more ambitious target, Only If is absolutely worth trying for its engaging puzzles, gripping "storyline," and unorthodox level design. Admittedly, it's got more than its share of snags - Creability's grasp on 3D platforming action could use a little polish, and there were some moments where my interest in experimenting was drowned out by my urge to shake the monitor and scream at it until it told me what I was doing wrong, and while the voice acting was largely some of the most human and realistic I've heard anywhere, it occasionally was so mumbled I couldn't make out a word of it (And no subtitles either! HOW IMMERSIVE!). All in all though, there's so much done excellent here that the scrappy edges you find now and again are completely forgivable.

And did I mention it's free?

For a game I'd heard nothing about and had next-to-no expectations for, Only If is an absolute masterpiece. Get it. Get it get it get. Unless you hate curse words, as there's a lot of those. Or if you hate that NPR show Wire Tap, because the characters sound almost exactly like that show's cast. But yeah, all the rest of you?

I'm waiting.