Elden Ring (2022)

I was putting off my 2nd playthrough of this until I did other stuff, but I finally just really wanted to do it and started it up yesterday with a build in mind and some maps to remind me where stuff was. I kinda dreaded the process of building up a character again and gathering stuff across this huge map, but I have enjoyed that part way more than expected. I've spent hours already running around doing stuff largely separate from the dungeons and main bosses I rushed to on the first run (in my defense I was just following the glowing yellow trail at first...). It's a pretty chill experience when I feel like I actually have knowledge and intent behind what I'm doing.

A big part of the appeal of this game for me was the unknown, playing it at launch with no surprises spoiled, no guides available, etc. But that was a double-edged sword, sometimes hugely exciting but at other times frustrating. While I wouldn't trade that experience because of the fun moments of discovery, I think on average I will enjoy the second playthrough more than the first. Already I have had a great time revisiting this amazing-looking world, finding things I missed the first time, appreciating its layout and geography. I've also got a better build cooking and a better idea when to do each thing, so it just feels really pleasant so far.

I’ve heard a lot about this game, the supposed undisputed GOTY for 2022. With a highly-anticipated DLC on the horizon, I thought I’d try it out. Unfortunately, I can say without exaggeration that Elden Ring is the worst game I’ve ever played in my life. Given its renown for punishing difficulty and intricate world-building, my expectations were admittedly quite high going in. There’s also the inherent hype from knowing they paid George R.R. Martin for the right to put his name in the credits so they can say they technically paid a writer in the course of developing this game. After defeating the Elden Pokémon and witnessing...whatever the hell happened in that ending cutscene, I couldn't help but question why the hell I wasted the past 5 hours slogging through the mind-numbing boredom that was Elden Flop.

First, the gameplay is shit. While I’ve seen Elden Ring lauded for its challenging combat mechanics and expansive open-world, the reality is more depressing than the Berserk manga the game so blatantly rips off at every turn. You will spend minutes in mind-numbing hack-and-slash combat, devoid of any semblance of strategy or nuance. Most of the combat boils down to popping 12 buffs, then walking in the room and activating a laser beam until the enemy health bars disappear. Thankfully, Fromsoft took a page out of the gacha genre’s playbook and included an auto-battle option in the form of “spirit ashes” which summon dudes to fight every boss for you, allowing you to bypass some of the game’s most painful segments.

Next, as many people with brains have noted, the game’s UI is incomprehensible. To select the game’s “piss-easy baby googoo gaga” difficulty, you have to equip a weapon that inflicts bleed, then go to the level-up menu, scroll down to ‘Dexterity’ and ‘Arcane’ and keep hitting the right button on them until the numbers go up. The game never explicitly tells you this either; you have to figure it out on your own, which is pretty bizarre for a so-called accessibility feature. The game is littered with design like this. For instance, infamously, to pause the game you have to go into the graphics menu, set everything to max, look at any asset in the game and try to move. Alternatively, you can play the aptly-named “Prepare to Pause Edition” of the game on last-gen consoles and achieve the same effect without having to sift through any options.

The character and enemy designs were puzzling to say the least. I was expecting some kind of dark fantasy setting full of neat designs and backstories. What I got is softcore porn that is only a fantasy for foot fetishists. Most of the characters in the game have feet. Hell, one late-game boss you have to sit and slap its feet (which makes a fap sound with each swipe) for like 5 minutes—while it shoots bullshit projectiles at you off-screen with no telegraphing—before it starts the second phase of the fight. The game similarly has these regular enemy giants which are really easy to fight with just one hand on your controller while you circle around their feet, hacking and slashing until they collapse and you catch a glimpse of those sweet, sweet callused soles. Other sexualized designs include this like really big hot dude in a castle who has hornily-grafted multiple other bodies onto himself, allowing him to have feet for days in all the right places. The fight itself is not hard at all, especially on piss-easy baby googoo gaga mode, with the only challenge being when you dodge roll and the busted camera inevitably zooms in on some of the boss’s feet while he juggles you with his many, many other feet. Other bosses include: Malenia, Foot Queen of Miquella who has never known the Feet (a lie); the Foreskin Duo; Rennala, Mooning Queen; Asstickle, All-Natural of the Void; Dragonlord Flaccidusex; Giant Cock with a face, Lord of Blasphemy; the Dungeater; and some stupid piece of shit on a horse who spawn camps new players at the start of the open world but whom I definitely beat on my first try.

Now, believe me, I could write a whole review just on feet in Elden Ring. But you’d probably like to hear more about the rest of the game. Fine, that won’t take long since there’s very little of it. Elden Ring was famously developed in just 3 days, a feat/feet the game repeatedly nods to throughout in a kind of meta joke by repeating the number 3 in its design elements. Along with the only 3 different [viable] weapon types in the game, there are 3 different areas and 3 different bosses, if you don’t count all the recycling of shitty repetitive dungeons and empty scenery you can traverse atop your goat-horse, Mario.

As for the lore and story? Awful, just fucking awful. Thankfully most of it is found in item descriptions so you can ignore it. The rest is found in an incomprehensible deluge of seemingly unending cutscenes masquerading as profound storytelling but feeling more like a bad movie than a video game. I skipped most of these cutscenes starting around season 5 and found the story made a lot more sense that way.

Lastly, the presentation. As the game is notoriously more unfinished than Metal Gear Solid V, you’ll notice right away they didn’t even make music for a lot of the game. Which is probably for the best since most of the tracks that are there just sound like feet slapping on violin strings. I eventually turned the music off and listened to kpop while I played, like it was just another session of Overwatch. The graphics on the other hand I must admit look exactly like what you’d expect from something that could be the best-selling game of all time. Unfortunately, the best-selling game of all time is Minecraft and that seems to be where Elden Ring drew its inspiration here from as everything is a cartoony blocky mess. It took me until halfway through the game to realize that was a fucking tree in the middle of the open world, not the sun. Real trees don’t glow, wtf.

I’m sorry to say that Elden Ring is exactly what I feared it might be: more overrated, generic, lazy, bloated AAA drivel not worth your evening or money. It has single-handedly made me more cynical about the future of gaming. I post this review as a status update because if I made it a review, I would be forced to give this game at least 1 star, which it has not earned in my eyes. I give Elden Ring 0.1/10. May its feet rot in the deepest depths of this swamp.

@BurningKirby

I’ll answer your question here where it’s a little more topical.

Yup, I played through Elden Ring once when it first came out and now that you mention it, I do feel like the experience was a bit flattened and normalized by the extremely forgiving checkpoint system. The souls recovery mechanic almost didn’t even need to be in the game.

I think what I would’ve preferred is a save point at the entrance of every dungeon and that’s it. You gotta go in, find the big baddy and execute it in one go. Make most of the dungeons on the shorter side and add some longer ones with unlockable shortcuts in typical souls fashion.

Elden Ring felt a bit vanilla to me compared to Dark Souls and Bloodborne (though I did still love it), and I think that might have been part of the reason why. It flattens the dramatic push and pull that make these game so fun for me.

It took around 2 months, but I’ve finally started to slow down with this game after around 160 hours played, it’s been a long time since a game has managed to keep me this invested for so long, but Elden Ring nailed it. Simplistic map design, minimal markers, exploration was the most fun I’ve experienced in an open world and the incredibly detailed landscape solidified that feeling. I’m not one to play through a game multiple times but Elden Ring’s fluid combat and build variety kept me constantly engaged. I could easily mention the frequent pop in I experienced or the recycled dungeon bosses in the late game, but these are just small smudges to the epic levels of enjoyment I had with this and I’ll be back for another run sooner rather than later.

Elden Ring Review

This Review will have spoilers!

Lets talk about my history with fromsoft. its not really big. I played Dark Souls first time because everyone kept raving it was the hardest thing they ever played, I didn't think it was hard but one thing I always liked about The Souls game where the enemy designs and the locations. So than i played Bloodborne, and i thought this game was incredible! The look of it, the setting, the tone, the enemies, the bosses just everything about the game was awesome and addictive.

The last Souls-like game i played from fromsoft was Sekiro. This game was badass and it makes you feel like a badass. One of the best combat systems in a game that just makes you feel amazing. The mechanic where you just parry the enemy and break there posture is so damn awesome! Some of the best fights in a game. When your reading the boss and parrying everything, its a feeling you don't get in any other game. So that's about my history with fromsoft's games, i only played 3 but i have played other souls-like games such as, Nioh, Nioh 2, Code Vein, Darksiders 3, so i do like those types of games. Only fromsoft can make them the best though it takes great enemy designs, level design and music for a good souls game for me, and thats what others lack when they make a souls like game.

I was happy when they announced Elden Ring because fromsoft is amazing at creating awesome stuff so an open world souls game just sounded awesome. I just wanted awesome bosses everywhere and crazy enemy designs and well-made locations, i was so intrigued to see what they could create.

Story

I'll be honest i do not care for the story in these games, there is no story but there's lore and im not interested breaking the game down to figure out the lore. The story to me in this game is your tarnished basically brought to life to hunt down and kill the demi-gods around the open world and become the Elden Lord and that's about it.

Gameplay

You start the game and pick a starting class and theres alot to choose from and i only choose the one with the coolest looking armor set.

Now the gameplay this could be a negative but i won't put it there. I wanted the gameplay to feel more better to feel like Bloodborne or just a bit like Sekiro, The dark souls combat was always slow to me and you don't do much, you attack, you roll, you can parry but its awful and that's about it. I liked the way it feels to dodge in bloodborne instead of the stupid rolling in these games, and if the combat was more like Sekiro the way it feels to attack atleast this game could have felt really good...but its not its your standard sluggish Dark souls. They could have atleast had where you could cancel your attack, but they don't even have that.

Whats new in this game is you can actually jump instead of that weird run and than hop jump they had in the dark souls games. They have a new thing called ashes of war which are special attacks you can use, and theres a bunch of these special moves. Some are good for attacks and some are good for mobility options such as the bloodhound step.

I think something also new is stunning enemies with heavy attacks. If you use heavy attacks in this game enemies get stunned pretty easily and i don't remember that being the case in the older dark souls games but i could be wrong. The magic is an improvement in the game, its far better than older games. You drink flask to heal yourself, and in this game there is a new one that restores magic and another special one thats a flask of Physick.

There is a ton of weapons in the game, a ton of magic just loads of different ways to play the game which is always cool.

The leveling is always like dark souls instead of souls its called runes in this game and you use them to level up just like its always been.

Open World Exploration

The open world in this game its pretty damn huge bigger than i thought it would be, its about 6 parts of the map and than there is hidden locations on the map that are underground so there is a lot of stuff in this game. New in this game is actually having a map to look at because no other souls games really had maps, it was just exploring around not really knowing where to go, but having the map to mark everything you been to is much better. There are the saving places, the sites of grace to save and leveling up, and this is also to fast travel around the maps to the other sites of grace you found in the world. Usually when you haven't been to one you will see it glow with light around it, indicating its a new site of grace you haven't found. The sites of grace also has a light telling you a direction you should go but it doesn't really help much.

You also get a horse to travel around in which is new in this game. You use the horse to get to higher places and even attack enemies on. Its not very good for combat in my opinion. I only ever used the horse for the dragons really.

Enemies are all throughout the world and bosses are everywhere as well. The amount of bosses in this game is probably 100+ seemingly a boss everywhere you turn. Having all these bosses since its open world you may run into a boss thats really strong and you die a lot to, well you can just leave and find another hopefully weaker boss to fight, you probably won't and you'll just be in an endless cycle of deaths for a while.

They do these kind of landmark things, were in every different part of the map theres always these churches and they give you these tears items to upgrade the amount of life your flask heals you for, Or you see these gold trees in the map that have these items to upgrade the number of flask you hold  at the grace. There are also these trees that always has a boss at and there also dragons everywhere as well and they give you these dragon powers for every one you kill. These are to use at this Dragon statue.

One of my favorite things i liked about the game was just exploring it seemed like every day i played i got into something new every time discovering a new area or a new boss or something hidden and i loved that about the game. Another thing i really enjoyed where the quest in the game. To be honest there aint much to do in this game except explore and kill bosses but having all these NPC's scattered throughout and getting quest from them was always fun and its a better alternative since the game story isn't layed out for you. The NPC's have stories and the quest for them are all pretty interesting but also difficult to do and find.

You can find stuff around to pick up and craft things, and there are these kind of magic towers everywhere as well.  Tombs and caves are everywhere in this game to and they usually have a boss fight. Honestly most of these bosses are optional only the main demi-god bosses are important and the main focus to completing the game. Its the same as all the other souls games really.

The main bosses are the ones that open new areas. When you beat the main demi-god bosses they give you remembrances you use these to get there weapon and outfits and other stuff. Another thing when you beat them is they allow you to go into these divine towers that are in every different part of the map. You have to search for them and they only open when you beat the main boss. Inside you get the bosses great rune and they give you stat boosts and abilities if you equip them.

Another thing i liked about this open world is that there are a lot of ways to get into areas in the open world, its never just one way there are multiple paths you can find. One way might be from a key item but than you'll find a completely different way where you didn't need the key at all or a NPC quest might lead you to a new area or there are these portal or trap treasure chest that will lead to different locations on the map.

Enemies,Bosses and Negatives

Alright this where this game falls very badly and im just being honest because i don't know what's with the gamers nowadays but they seemingly think every things a 10 out of 10 or a masterpiece all of a sudden. I heard this for Deathloop, Last Of Us 2 Resident Evil 2 and now Elden Ring and its just getting ridiculous.now. When theres clear problems about these games and no one talks about them.

I understand people look at games all differently and don't see problems others see, but i have a lot of problems with Elden Ring. The first is the open world. I think the open world is boring and not interesting at all to explore. At first you enjoy it but as you get deeper in the game and get to the other areas it really just looks the same and they repeat so many areas in the game.

In the open world there are always these collapsed pieces of buiding for whatever reason, Many places got these big rivers that are basically the same. Limgrave got the river with the dragon that attacks. Liurnia got another river and its just with fog added. In Caelid, it has the same thing but just with Scarlet rot everywhere. All these repeated stuff on these maps. The Mountaintop of the Giants has another river but its just frozen with ice. There's even underground areas with rivers as well like Siofra, Ainsel and the Mohgyn palace with another river of Scarlott Rot everywhere.

The other things that repeats is, there is always ruins everywhere on these maps, like all throughout map and they are always the same. Some of these ruins got items or a boss and thats about it, nothing interesting at all about them.

The churches of Marika are also all over the map in different locations. Look, i understand these are landmarks and they usually have the sacred tears, but they could have did some other stuff different getting those tears. They could have gave them to the tomb bosses or something else.

Speaking of the tombs...these are pretty damn lazy, they mostly all look the same, they have the same enemies mostly, they ain't interesting to look at or explore. They try to switch them up and have like this statue that tries to run you over. You have to figure out how to get pass it which is fine...the first time you do it. Than the statue starts being in different tombs and it just gets annoying seeing the damn thing.

The tombs are what has like most of the bosses in the game. The amount of tombs and catacombs are maybe 50+ and none of the bosses in those tombs/catacombs are interesting at all.  Honestly there not even worth wasting your time on them unless you want those spirit ashes. The spirit ashes are mostly in those places and there are some items like talismans but not many.

Another thing is those tomb bosses repeat to... They will just add like two bosses at once to make it different, its just lazy.

The most bosses you'll fight are those side ones in the tombs, but than in the open world you fight more like the dragons, the tree and others. The dragons are also the same... There is a dragon i think on every location, which is fine...except there all the same to. All the dragons do the same stuff, they do the same attacks and the fights always the same. The only different dragon is the one with the red lighting and the one where Ranni is, but all the rest are the same.

The tree guardians guarding the trees on the map, all the same. Its the same fight over and over. One might add a scarlet rot ailment which basically damages you if you get inflicted by it but thats it... Oh and they add two to fight instead of one. Whats worst about these things is they start showing up other places besides the tree as enemies and its just lame.

The mutated tree is yet another repeated enemy everywhere as well. You fight one in the tomb and than they just start appearing all over in locations. I don't understand what happened... Like why did fromsoft decide to get lazy all of sudden. It gets even worst to.

The main bosses in the game, the demi-gods, which is probably the best part of the game you start seeing them repeated as well! Like what the hell! Margit you fight like 3 times, one being Margott but its the same fight instead an added 2nd phase. Godfrey you fight once but than hes like in the golden lineage evergaol. Its not him but the fight is pretty much the same with an added phase 2.

Mogwyn you fight twice and ones just a lesser weaker version of him. Godfrey you fight him twice one being a spirit version of him. The only main bosses that don't repeat are Radahn, Rennala and Rykard, Maliketh and the last two bosses. That is really stupid. Your playing this game for 80+ hours and you keep seeing the same stuff over and over instead of different and new and fresh.

The normal enemies get repeated to and get put everywhere. The tomb bosses and catacombs are mostly stronger regular enemies in the game. The evergaol as well they have bosses in them and some of those are stronger existing enemies such as The Crucible Knight.

Fromsoft seriously got lazy in this game. People want to say its the best open world and its a masterpiece and its not. Its not well made or well designed. The other souls game i can't remember this happening. I don't think i see repeated enemies and bosses or locations that look the same. It was always something new and fresh. Elden ring the first 70+ hours are good but than the cracks start forming.

When i played, i played like 70+ hours just exploring. I didn't fight a main boss til 80+ hours in. Than when i finally continued and beat the first boss and went to these new areas like Liurnia and Leyndell and mountaintop of the giants i got disappointed. Enemies started being the same and the areas started being the same. It was interesting finding the other underground places but than they were even the same. Same spirit enemies, same puzzles, same bosses and it really sucked.

Bloodborne and Dark Souls had some great enemy designs a lot of really cool ones and Elden Ring does not. Theres gargoyles and these sentinel giants and there everywhere. The boring giant crab where every river is and they just put a different color on it. Giant dog enemies that comes in black and white giant crows, giant lobsters... does this really sound like interesting enemies?

There are wolves everywhere, there are small dogs everywhere that have different ailments. The tribe looking enemies and the tree enemies are also everywhere. Its just the same thing. For it to have this fantasy setting, man is it boring.

The area before the final area the mountaintops of the giants man i expected some cool stuff, you know cause your at the end of the game, and there is nothing...nothing different....nothing you haven't seen already, more giants, more lobsters. There is a side boss there Commander Niall and guess what? you fight a version of this guy in Caelid so he just has a different 2nd phase....thats it.

I don't understand whats with this game in spirit version of bosses and the bosses with a different name but there identical to a boss you already faced, its a lazy design man, you gonna tell me you couldn't come up with something different. Fromsoft has made so many creature designs and boss designs in many other games, but yet in this game they decide to reuse bosses like every openworld. If they were gonna do that than why the hell do open world. I rather just have what they made before with all the great areas and stuff.

So your at the end of the game 3 bosses left and you meet the first one and its gonna be a brand new boss you hasn't faced....nope it isn't its a boss you already fought in a spirit form. This Godfrey boss freaking sucked...did fromsoft run out of ideas? All this guy does is AOE attacks, he slams the ground in his 2nd phase, so you have to jump. Than you fight his 3rd phase and its even more annoying because all he does is grab you like hes Zangief or Hakan in street fighter.

The worst part about the grab is the animation takes to long watching it and he keeps doing it. This is probably the only boss in this game that annoyed the hell out of me. He wasn't hard he was annoying with his dumb AOE attacks than his grabbing. I was even more annoyed cause i already fought this guy before.

Afterwards the last two bosses Radagon and whatever the hell final fight is, Radagon is fine but for some reason these last 2 bosses have a bunch of projectile attacks and AOE attacks. Radagon is a good fight but after Radagon is freaking terrible! That final boss makes no sense it don't even fit in with everything you done in the damn game. It looks like a big dinosaur, it could be a pokemon. You gonna tell me this is the final boss in the game, 170+ hours i played and this is the last thing i see.

All this dumb boss does is run away... He runs away and throws projectiles. You get close to him he uses an AOE attack where you have to run away. Another attack he does is this ring that closes on you and if you don't get away you'll get hit with another AOE attack this is seriously rediculous. His final attack is this stupid projectile that keeps on hitting you and you cannot avoid it...so yeah a horrible end like this gives the game a 10 out of 10.

I don't know what happened with games where they have lame and disappointing final areas and final bosses nowadays. Final bosses are supposed to be memorable, its what you sunk hours in to get to, you want a memorable fight and a fitting end and these games in this age don't seem to get that anymore. Your just left with an Unsatisfying end.

Another thing i'll add in and it didn't bother me when i played because i didn't use any of this stuff, but for whatever reason fromsoft decided to go easy on players in this game. There is two really broken things in this game, one being bleed and the horrible spirit ashes. If you use these two things this games easy. Bleed causes massive damage to bosses even if your under leveled and mostly all bosses can be effected by it. All you do is hit the boss a few times with a weapon that has a bleed or a spell that has bleed and bleed occurs massively damaging bosses and enemies.

Spirit ashes can be used mostly in every boss fight. All you do with these is summon them in the boss fight and the bosses attention will be focused on the spirit ash and you just hit the boss in the back and that's it you don't have to do anything.

Its really baffling fromsoft allowed that. Any other game dev would have made bosses immune to all that stuff, but you can use spirit ashes every boss fight making bosses easy, so much for any challenge in the game using those two things, this games will be easy.

It was to the point where people were thinking that bosses were made with the spirit ashes in mind and that they had to use them. This seriously wasn't a great decision by fromsoft.

Throughout all the negatives there is one thing that saves the game, something that is really memorable in this entire game and that's the Malenia boss fight.

Malenia

The Malenia boss fight in this game is freaking awesome and shes just optional for whatever reason. The Malenia boss is everything i love in bosses, its a fast paced fight, you have to use your reactions and she doesn't kill you in one or two hits. Shes very hard but not in a way that feels cheap.

She has a long sword that a lot of reach, shes very fast and she always has attacks that keeps her up close to you, and she attacks multiple times. She can also heal if she hits you which sounds horrible when she hits multiple times  but its not because she doesn't heal that much. Her worst attack though is she'll go in the air and will do a flurry of attacks and they are very fast attacks, if you get hit and she does it, your pretty much dead. So that is one of the things you have to figure out in the fight.

If that's not enough she has a 2nd fight where she has scarlot rot to her attacks and she has wings and its just awesome. This is the best fight in the entire game. If you find her, the game doesn't get better than that, the game seriously goes downhill from there. Malenia seriously is the peak of this game. I had so much fun fighting her and i died a ton but its just a memorable fight and one of the best things about it.

Now if your using that cheap stuff like bleed or spirit ashes well she ain't gonna be hard at all and you won't have to do much of anything. If you fight her like i did, no bleed, no ashes and hell i didn't even use ashes of war. If you come into the fight like that, than this fight is amazing and one of the few or only fights in this game where i was satisfied and happy beating her.

Getting to her was cool to. You had to find a hidden area and go through Miquella's halig tree and this area was great. It did have the same enemies as everywhere else but the locations was great and really difficult. I got my ass kicked in this place and died a ton but the pay off was worth it.

Final Thoughts

I did enjoy Elden Ring, like the first 80+ hours i had fun just exploring around. Everyday was a new adventure, either i was finding a new area or different bosses or whatever. My journey in this game i pretty much explored all of Limgrave and beat all the bosses there. Than i found the dragon and that trap chest and it took me to the cave in Caelid.

This is where hell began for me, i died so many times in that cave, trying to figure out how to get past those bugs with the staff and projectiles. I died for hour and hours until i finally got out into Caelid. Everywhere was death in this place, everywhere i went i was dying left and right. I hated those damn giant crows they were the bane of my existence in that place, i died over and over to those things.

The journey through that place made me learn better though because i was struggling to some enemies and side bosses, like they never seem to stop attacking or leave there selves open. Thats one other good thing i can say about this game is the enemy A.I. I feel like fromsoft perfected the enemy a.i in this game. A lot of bosses would attack and than you start rolling from it but than bosses start adding a little delay to there attacks to throw you off.

Some enemies and bosses seemed like they attacked nonstop. Going through Caelid and killing every boss doing every tomb i finished and Elden Ring got so much easier. Its not because i was over leveled or had strong equipment its just because i learned the game and from that point on i barely struggled and was going through bosses like nothing. It also helps that i finally found a weapon i liked and a build i wanted.

At first i went for a magic and Intelligence build and it was bad cause it took so long to get any new spells. So i just stopped and went for strength and stamina and health and a bit of magic. The weapon i used were dual magic blades, when i found these i was destroying everything in the game. The weapons were fast, so if any enemy left themselves open i could hit them quick, for bosses if they left themselves open for a couple seconds i could hit them and dodge out of the way quickly. They weren't even strong weapons, I could just attack so much more with them. Imagine if i used bleed i wouldn't have died at all.

Im not sure if this game was hard. I had said this was the hardest souls game i played but than again i went to a really late area early so i don't know. When i finally decided to fight an actual main boss like Margit i was 80 hours in. When i got to new areas i was excited of what else i was gonna run into in the game, only to find that it was pretty much the same. I was doing the samething, fighting the same enemies going into the same boring tombs.

The game shines when your off the open world like when you go to the Capital City in Leyndell or when you go to the Raya Lucaria Academy or the Volcano Manor or Miquella's Haligtree. These places look great there designed really awesome. Its just there isn't many of these carefully crafted and designed areas in this game. All the areas come from tombs mostly and the open world aint memorable theres nothing interesting about it.

I enjoyed the side quest in the game meeting all these NPC's but man is it a pain to completing them, you just never know where to go. I had to look these up cause i didn't want to miss them. One pissed me off though which was the millicent one. This was the quest that most interest me and i screwed it up in the end because i didn't fight an usurped tree in that river. You had to beat it than leave and comeback to do the last part of the quest and i had no idea i had to beat that thing. The quest are always vague but it gives you something to do and there are a lot of them.

I also really wanted to kill every boss in this game but once i got to Malenia i was pretty much done, i've seen all this game has to offer and i just wanted to finish it. I missed two bosses though this other dragon one that had projectiles, you fight him in the final area, the Farun Azula area Than there was another boss that is basically Astel... The same shit in Ranni's quest.

The final areas of the game sucked man. The Mountaintop of the giants and Farum Azula. They just had nothing different besides a main boss and some hidden bosses

I do not think this game is better than fromsoft others games, definately not bloodborne or Dark Souls and Definitely not Sekiro. The worlds not memorable the bosses aren't great besides Malenia, Rykard, Radahn and i guess Mohgyn was fine. The worlds not well designed and not well made and feels lazy. I don't see how people can call this game a masterpiece, its just ridiculous.

There are 3 endings in the game and there not that impactful but fromsoft endings never are anyway. When i beat this game i did not want to play it again. Usually when i beat there games i want to play it again right away like Bloodborne and Sekiro, but this game i was done.

Final score for Elden Ring is a 6 out of 10.

Sintetizando:

El combate es posiblemente el más refinado de todos los souls, muy placentero y con muchas más opciones de personalización (aunque de alguna manera se sienten similares). Los hitboxes son una locura y dominar al enemigo se siente mejor que nunca.

Gráficamente es precioso, tiene un diseño y un cuidado por el detalle brutal. Las partículas de este juego son una pasada, pero la estrella se la lleva un diseño de escenarios brutal donde cada uno se siente radicalmente distinto al otro, desplegando una personalidad enorme.

Las dungeon es cierto que pierden un poco el fuelle en esta entrega, en parte por la naturaleza del mundo abierto y por el reciclaje necesario de jefes y decoraciones para llenar el espacio. Las mazmorras de historia son otra cosa absolutamente distinta, llena de personalidad y desafío, pero son tan escasas...

La historia se expone de manera algo más clara y lo que he podido pillar me ha parecido muy interesante, pero cierto es que se hace una exposición más literal de los primeros compases y luego la cosa pasa a ser muy difusa. Para quien le guste tendrá la línea inicial de historia (reconstruir simplemente el anillo) algo más obvia y una serie de entramados más obtusos que construye la alternativa al final por defecto.

Resumiendo, el juego me parece una auténtica pasada y me pasé la primera mitad alucinando con el desafío, los escenarios, los enemigos y elucubrando sobre la historia. Llegada Malenia, una vez vencida con mucho esfuerzo, el resto del juego me pareció demasiado acelerado y poco satisfactorio. Pico de Gigantes, Farum Azula o el mausoleo de Mogh son sitios cortos que realmente no aportan tanto y los combates finales aunque impresionan por el lore de los bosses puedes sentirte un poco perdido ante lo que pasa al final... lo que le quita el efectismo. Pero al final del día es un señor juegazo y sería de inocente pensar que se puede mantener el ritmo las 100 horas que me ha durada la primera partida.

i almost completely ignored the story of this game and replaced it with my headcanon of "varre said i get no bitches and now ive gotta prove him wrong by getting the elden ring or whatever"

overall this games a lotta fun and discovering new areas is always really cool but theres a lot of little issues scattered throughout that weigh it down for me which is why its not a 5/5 (especially looking up what im supposed to do for a ton of questlines in order to avoid wandering around aimlessly for 20 years hoping i run into the npc or boss battle or whatever by chance)

also i made my character markiplier

In a very short amount of time, this game has become one of my favorites, if not my favorite video game of all time. The more I played, the better it was. There's already a plethora of reviews that accurately describe how amazing the features of this game are. So I won't do that. Instead, I will list all the things I didn't like about the game.

Before I begin, let me reiterate that I absolutely loved the game - the criticism does not come from a place of personal frustration and I think it's objective. And also, they're barely problems. I had to dig very deep to find these small potatoes.

Names

Given how vast the lore of Elden Ring is, it's no surprise that there are a lot of characters. The character names are very annoying. Almost all of them start with either a G, R or M, so I think it's fairly obvious who is behind them. It's very easy to start confusing names and having to look up who is actually who. Just to name a few, in the "G" category, there's Godwyn, Godfrey, Godrick, Godefroy, Gideon, Gurranq... In the "R" category, we have Radahn, Radagon, Roderika, Rykard, Ranni, Renna, Rennala... In the "M" category, there's Malenia, Melina, Mohg, Morgott, Millicent, Miquella, Marika, Maliketh...

None of these names sounds bad individually, but when put together, their "sameness" gets annoying.

No mounts allowed

Near the beginning of the game, you are given a mount. Pretty soon you get used to it, and it becomes almost a necessity to travel. Without it, traveling is so slow, given the size of the world. However, in some places, you are not allowed to use your mount. Most of them make sense (dungeons, castles, interiors, etc.), but... sometimes, you're not allowed to use your mount without any discernable reason (looking at you, Ainsel River!).

Well, that's pretty much all the criticism I can come up with. This game is perfect.

Elden Ring oli ehkä fanaattisesti odotetuin peli omaan muistiin. Kenties Cyberpunk 2077 vei hypemääränsä vielä tämän ohi, mutta sen hype kosahti ja kovaa pelin katastrofaaliseen julkaisuun.

Miten kävi Elden Ringin? No, helvetin hyvin.

Peli tuntuu aluksi ehkä liiankin tutulta ja turvalliselta From Software -tavaralta muutamalla pikkumuutoksella. Tyyli on hyvin darksoulsmainen ja esimerkiksi taistelutuntuma on todella lähellä Dark Souls 3:sta hyppyiskujen ja ratsailla taistelun lisäyksillä. Hetken pelaamisen jälkeen pelin avoin maailma ja sen tuomat palkkiot kuitenkin vievät mennessään pahemmin, kuin muut souls-pelit ovat onnistuneet tekemään. Pelin maailma on käsittämättömän tarkkaan suunniteltu ja täynnä kiinnostavaa löydettävää. Ihan kaikki ei silti ole uniikkia, sillä osa pienemmistä dunkuista ja pikkubosseista on kierrätyskamaa, mutta nämä ovat vapaaehtoisia sivusisältöjä, joten rike ei ole merkittävä. Lisäksi hauska näitä on kierrätyksestä huolimatta koluta.

Moni epäili pelin haasteen ottavan osumaa avoimen maailman tuomien grindausmahdollisuuksien myötä. Näin ei ole kuitenkaan käynyt. Tarinabossit tarjoavat pelissä kunnolla haastetta, etenkin jos ne pelaa suunnilleen suositellussa vaiheessa peliä. Itselle pelin ensimmäinen kunnon bossi, Margit, oli kunnon viesti siitä, että helpolla ei sitä tulla taaskaan pääsemään. Ja pelin viimeiset bossit olivat kunnon kovia, kivuliaita potkuja kepeksille. Bossit ovat ylipäätään vaikeampia moveseteiltään kuin aiemmissa peleissä: hitaat, viivyttelevät ja pelaajan dodgerytmin sekoittavat lyönnit sekä hankalasti väistettävät AoE-iskut ovat Elden Ringissä peruskauraa.

Teknisen toteutuksen puiolesta peli on myös miellyttävää materiaalia. Vaikka grafiikat eivät ole sukupolven parasta antia ja pienet framerate-ongelmat nostivat ajoittain päätään Series X:n performance modella, pelin tyyli on ja maailma ovat vain niin hiton taidolla tehtyjä, että hienoja miljöitä ja näkymiä pelissä on jatkuvasti. Audiopuolella ollaan todella lähellä tyypillistä From Softwarea. Ääniefektit ovat taidokkaasti tehtyjä ja painostava orkestraalinen musiikki esiintyy vain joskus ja jouluna. Pääosan pelistä saa nauttia eri paikkojen ambiensista. Itselle ei From Softwaren peleistä oikein ikinä ole musiikit jääneet mieleen, eikä jää tälläkään kertaa, mutta peliin ne sopivat taas kerran.

Moninpeli on ollut aiemmissa From Softwaren peleissä mustan magian kaltaista ihme häröilyä. Veikkaisin, että tekijät koittavat sitoa moninpelin toteutusta loogisesti pelin maailmaan, mikä johtaa outoihin järjestelyihin esimerkiksi kaverin peliin liittymisessä. Tähänkin on tuotu nyt uusia työkaluja ja apuja vaikka edelleenkin systeemi on oudompi kuin melkein missää tahansa muussa moninpelissä. Outoudestaan huolimatta systeemi toimii hyvin ja nyt jopa yllättävän helppoa liittyä kaverin peliin ja lähteä co-oppina tutkimaan ja tuhoamaan.

Pelin yksittäinkin vahvat osa-alueet luovat yhdessä kokonaisuuden, jonka veto on valtava. Pasianssin speedrunnaamista lukuunottamatta, en muista koska viimeksi peli olisi koukuttanut minut yhtä epäterveellisesti kuin Elden Ring. Peli pyrkii ajatuksiin jatkuvasti. Itsellä tuli lopussa liikaa suorittamista ja turhautumista läpäisyn saavuttamiseksi, mutta tämä oli lähinnä omaa jääräpäisyyttä ja typeryyttä. Ja onneksi se ei pilannut fiilistäni pelistä. Elden Ring on mahtava.

Oman hengen- ja mielenterveyden vuoksi on kuitenkin otettava hieman taukoa ennen uuden runin aloittamista.

This is a biased review. I have been a Souls and Miyazaki fan since Dark Souls and have gotten immense enjoyment from each entry in the series. In my opinion, Elden Ring is both a natural evolution of the series and the best iteration of the formula. While this game, like all other From Software entries, are not for everyone if it jibes with you one of the most engaging gaming experiences awaits. To note, I spent 90 hours and got 39/42 achievements, so it's safe to say I experienced around 90% (if not more) of the content. The only achievements I am missing are related to the different endings for the game. TL; DR this game rocks.

The game isn't perfect at release due to performance issues on the PC. Overall, it ran pretty smooth but occasionally I would get frame rate stutters that would last for a second or two. These were rare and while not ideal didn't bother me. They typically happened in the Open World when there were a ton of enemies on screen. Another performance issue gamers may have issues with is the locked frame rate of 60 FPS. I didn't mind, but I understand why this would rub some gamers the wrong way. Finally, the game crashed 3 times and resulted in me needing to reset my PC. 3 crashes over the course of 90 hours and a new release isn't great but not terrible. These issues all seem fixable after a few patches, but I don't think these should prevent you from buying the game. One of the best parts of a Souls game is the discovery and that could be ruined for you as more time passes. If you compare these issues with Cyberpunk's botched launch it is night and day and spades above. I didn't encounter any bugs while playing for 90 hours which blows my mind due to the sheer scope and craft of the game.

The scope and level of detail are the most impressive I have encountered in any game. Landscapes, ruins, towns and enemies are not copy pasted. There is attention to detail about the types of enemies that would inhabit a given biome. For example, in Caleid, which is plagued, there are large monstrosities. In Limgrave, the starting zone, there are mostly knights, bandits and wolves. If you move up to the Lake biome, you will encounter strange frog people and wizards (there are multiple schools for sorcery at the Lake), ect... the point being, thought was given to the types of enemies that inhabit different regions which breathes life into the world. Sometimes I felt overwhelmed by the sheer scope, but curiosity got the better of me and I would pick a direction and just ride.

The best part of the exploration are the controls for Torrrent. The mounted controls and combat are bar none the smoothest I have experienced in any game. Skyrim, Witcher and Red Dead pale in comparison. It feels great to release the joy stick and have your horse completely stop. In the other examples I listed, there is typically a delay where your horse will keep moving forward for a bit before stopping which makes them all feel janky compared to Elden Ring. The double jump is responsive and gives you extra vertical control. The mounted controls are one of the biggest reasons I found exploration so enjoyable. Combat takes getting used to, but compare this to BOTW, Skyrim, Witcher or Red Dead and it's still better before you adjust. Eventually it can be exhilarating to joist with other enemies or large monstrosities. It's interesting how much torrent fixes issues with previous Souls games. Such as large poison swamps. You can know just ride over them and not worry about getting poisoned. There is a cool moment where you get invaded in the swamp and forced to dismount with amplified the panic.

There were countless moments where I felt I had reached somewhere out of bounds, to only be rewarded with loot. The fact that From Software expected players to push the limits and find this spot speaks at the level of respect they hold for their gamers. While some gamers may find it frustrating that every reward you find will not be useful, I personally like it. It makes those rare finds that are amazing all the more rewarding. It encourages you to remember where items are located for new playthroughs and to explore everything you come across because you never know what you will find. If nothing else, you will always get runes which make you stronger so it's objectively never a waste of time. This also allows gamers to plan courses for new builds, where you b-line to specific items to get your build online faster. This course plotting has always been a feature to Souls game, but it's taken to new heights with the open world and a horse. This is a subjective thing, but I much prefer this to the reward loop of BOTW. Getting another heart piece or slightly increasing stamina, or finding a cool sword that breaks after 50 swings feels meager in comparison to my Moonveil that obliterated bosses and players alike.

I've seen plenty of negative reviews complaining about no guidance which I would argue is completely false. When you find key Graces, a literal arrow appears both in game and on the mini-map that points to where you need to head next... did you just not look at your screen? Sure this is different than the Witcher or Red Dead that obtrusively places markers on the UI and map that tell you exactly where to go. I like the overt yet subtly hands off approach of this game. It encourages you to just ride in a random direction and explore. If you hit a proverbial wall in the form of a boss smashing you into marmalade, then warp to a previous Grace and ride in a new direction. Easy. Of course I am stubborn, so I will keep bashing my head against that proverbial wall until it smashes.

The lore is the best and most internally consistent of all entries in the Souls series. The style of story telling will not be for everyone, but if you prefer a game focused on game play over story then this will probably be for you. I prefer quality over quantity when it comes to narrative. The contradictions and loop holes never bothered me in previous entries because of how obtuse they were to follow. Here each NPC has clear and consistent objectives for themselves, other NPCs and the world as a whole. It can be tough to remember the details and sometimes where you are supposed to go due to no journal. I'm on the fence over this decision. On one hand I respect it, on the other I wouldn't have complained to have a tracker of some sort. The game already includes pseudo journal entries. Sometimes a NPC will hand you a note or clue. I think all NPCs that give a quest should have handed you a note. These are never dense and only give you a slight push in the right direction. O well. None of these side quests are mandatory but I enjoyed investigating and completing the ones I came across and some have great rewards tied to them. Despite being thorough, I believe I only completed half of the side quests. Some I simply missed or did a few things wrong to progress the story. Veterans to the series will expect this feature.

The greatest feature of the open world design is making a Souls game the most accessible it has ever been. That said, this game is still tough as nails so don't walk into this expecting a cake walk. In previous entries, you would hit bottleneck moments where you have to kill a boss to progress. No longer the case since you can now explore one of hundreds of other options in the world. Eventually, certain bosses need to die but it's possible to explore and dungeon crawl enough to make a previous bottleneck into a cake walk. In previous entries NPC summons did exist but were not always present for a given boss. With Spirit Ashes this is no longer a problem. You can almost always reliably summon a minion to help with a boss. There are a few exceptions to this rule, but I believe every mandatory boss allows you to summon a dude to help. The Marionnet archers are great early in the game and Mimic Tear is probably the best option. I heard Jelly bro is a total Chad in the early game so maybe check him out.

The game has higher replayability compared to any other Souls game. While build variety is similar to other entries, the open world is what creates vast permutations when starting a new build. The tool kit is expanded with Ashes of War (AoW) making weapon upgrading both more accessible and versatile than ever before and you get summons you can experiment with. AoW can be strong and give you another combat option to throw in the mix. Once I got Moonveil, I mostly used it's AoW because of how strong and versatile it was. I played a sorcery build and it's never felt stronger in the series. My quibble with the magic is there are a ton of redundant spells and high level spells typically cost too much FP for the amount of damage they do. It's not a big deal, but it does make level 1 spells typically better as a result. This is an issue that other entries in the series had as well. The game allows you to experiment with builds by allowing you to respec your points after killing one of the major bosses. Another cool thing is it seems they made pure archery viable for the first time in the series. After a break, I'm excited to start a new character with a completely different play style.

The combat is the most refined yet. The hit boxes are surprisingly accurate. If a swing is high, you can use an emote to lay down and dodge it! Hit boxes have always felt janky in previous titles so it's nice to see an objective improvement in an ongoing issue. They added a flask that gives you temporary buffs (another layer of depth and customization to combat). These can easily be swapped out at graces.

While there are plenty of bosses and mini-bosses that are repeated throughout the game, they typically add a new ability to switch it up. My favorite example of this is with Commander Niall. You first fight this boss in the swamp. He has a similar move set, but summons a bunch of weaker enemies that he can buff. In the Commander Niall version of the fight, he summons two mini-bosses... after you kill the mini-bosses, Commander Niall buffs himself with lightning and has massive AOE attacks.The fight is tough as nails and an interesting example of how much small tweaks can radically change a fight. That all said, there are also a staggering amount of unique bosses, so I don't view this as criticism. Instead, it feels like coverage. I don't think From Software expected everyone to explore every square inch of the world. Including the previous bosses and mini-bosses gives more opportunity to encounter them and can serve as a means of showing progression; In the later biomes, mini-bosses and bosses will appear as normal enemies.

Overall I felt most bosses, encounters and dungeons were well designed and varied. The legacy dungeons are among the best level designs released by From Software. Even a cave or tunnel in the open world can be surprisingly sprawling, though sometimes feels copy and pasted like the many caves in Skyrim or Morrowind.

There are some exceptions:

Fallingstar Beast Boss fight in a Cavern. It is near impossible to not get rammed before you are even able to start the fight proper. Due to my vitality, the boss was able to kill me before I could do anything... to boot the run to the boss takes over a minute which makes the whole ordeal a slog. I think the boss has an interesting move set but the area is dog shit for fighting him. You fight a full grown fallingstar in the open world and when I could mount on Torrent and had space to avoid the relentless assault I really enjoyed the boss design.

A case of bad level design would be Auriza Hero’s Grave. There are a few moments where I feel like you have to die to learn how to progress. Such as when you are being charged by a chariot and you have to jump off a ledge, but you need to land on a narrow catwalk you can't see from above.. so you basically need to die here a few times to learn how to drop off... It's punishing, sadistically so given the length of the gauntlet). After you have progressed. you need to stop the chariots by hitting a pillar that raises. For some reason this causes a chariot to spawn to destroy the others? It makes no sense and you basically have to hit the pillar once and die. There is no indication that hitting the pillar is the solution because you are given no positive feedback afterwards. Instead, a chariot will just chill in the flames like nothing is wrong... In contrast, I loved Gelmir Hero's Grave. It takes a unique and interesting mechanic and revolves an entire tomb around it. You reach a seeming dead end but if you rack your brain you can enter a wholly secret area that includes a boss. I respect how intricately the devs added secrets in each dungeon. Hell, they hid entire zones. This is something that other open world games have never done before. Trust the player to explore and have fun on their own.

In conclusion, this is my current game of the year and game of the decade. It has flaws, but elevates the open world genre even if it doesn't reinvent the wheel. It won't be for everyone, but if you are a longtime Souls fan it will feel like a new home.