Status Aleosha Jan 15, 2026
Baldur’s Gate: Dark Alliance has always been one of my guilty pleasures. There’s something oddly charming about its simplicity—and, admittedly, about how unapologetically sexualized every female character is. I even realized I finished the first episode in co-op about fifteen years ago, though I barely remember any of it.
What surprised me this time around is how brutal the game …
Baldur’s Gate: Dark Alliance has always been one of my guilty pleasures. There’s something oddly charming about its simplicity—and, admittedly, about how unapologetically sexualized every female character is. I even realized I finished the first episode in co-op about fifteen years ago, though I barely remember any of it.
What surprised me this time around is how brutal the game actually is. Like most ARPGs, it’s essentially an economy game: the goal is to bring more value out of the dungeon than you spend going in. Dark Alliance comes dangerously close to breaking even. Playing as the Archer really highlights this. Your basic attacks do pitiful damage, so you rely on flame arrows—which cost mana—and arrows in general, which don’t drop in sufficient quantities. On top of that, you need healing potions because the built-in regeneration barely keeps you alive.
Loot drops are stingy. I might have found a pair of +1 gloves, but I was still better off just buying leather armor from the vendor. Even the “town portal” scrolls you need for shopping runs aren’t cheap. It often feels like you’re paying for the privilege of clearing dungeons rather than being rewarded for it.
Things got especially desperate in the sewers. The only way I managed to kill both the rat miniboss (of course there’s a rat miniboss) and the bugbear boss was by boxing myself in with crates they couldn’t path around, then slowly turning them into pincushions.
I started playing on the original Xbox, then remembered it was ported to the Switch and moved over. That said, I think I actually prefer the original’s low-resolution look—it somehow fits the game better.
The biggest issue, though, is that Dark Alliance is simply not very engaging in single-player. Experience gain is painfully slow, leaving you stuck with a single skill for far too long. Without the momentum of co-op, it’s hard to find the motivation to keep going.
