Squirrel Stapler box art

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Squirrel Stapler

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Squirrel Stapler

Sep 11, 2023

Main game

3.40 average rating based on 10 ratings

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Originally created as part of The Dread X Collection II, Squirrel Stapler is a horror hunting simulator that satirizes low budget edutainment games with pitch black humor and panic-inducing absurdist horror. A lonely man living in a remote cabin wakes up one day and realizes his beloved--a dismembered corpse nailed to the cabin wall--has been made ugly and rotten by the flies that swarm her. He wishes she were beautiful, like the squirrels of the wood. And so he sets out to hunt the squirrels of the wood, so that he might staple them to her and make her beautiful … More
Originally created as part of The Dread X Collection II, Squirrel Stapler is a horror hunting simulator that satirizes low budget edutainment games with pitch black humor and panic-inducing absurdist horror. A lonely man living in a remote cabin wakes up one day and realizes his beloved--a dismembered corpse nailed to the cabin wall--has been made ugly and rotten by the flies that swarm her. He wishes she were beautiful, like the squirrels of the wood. And so he sets out to hunt the squirrels of the wood, so that he might staple them to her and make her beautiful again. But that is easier said than done. A sinister presence lurks in the deep forest, and it has only one rule: "Thou shalt not staple squirrels!" Less
Release Dates
Sep 11, 2023 Full Release (Worldwide)
PC (Microsoft Windows)
Feb 22, 2024 (Worldwide)
Nintendo Switch
Oct 16, 2025 Full Release (Worldwide)
PlayStation 5
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User Stats
81
In Collection
4
Wish Listed
0
Playing
40
Backlogged
How Long Is Squirrel Stapler?
No playthrough data yet
Poro
Poro gave Apr 14, 2024
Poro gave Apr 14, 2024
[Borat Voice] My wife

Short and sweet, Squirrel Stapler is a very simple retro-feeling game where you shoot squirrels so you can make your wife beautiful again. And then God comes greet you.

It's hard to pinpoint exactly what genre you might want to shelf Squirrel Stapler in: different from Szymanski's other games (DUSK, Iron Lung...) it takes itself less seriously and hands you over less than an hour (maybe) of fun. It's an evidently horror game but with a comical/humor way to it that makes it less creepy overall while still maintaining that you are doing/have done something quite unspeakable.

The atmosphere keeps you on your toes and there's moment where the environmental storytelling catch you off guard in a moment or another, forcing a whimper out of your lips the moment you least expect it.

All in all, a nice experience.

TheWhiteDragon69
TheWhiteDragon69 gave May 23, 2026
TheWhiteDragon69 gave May 23, 2026
Amazing
This review is for the PC (Microsoft Windows) version

My wife has never been so beautiful