Pitfall! (1982)

Look: 8/10 I actually really enjoyed the color scheme and "vibe" of Pitfall. I do love the tree horizon/background and the Activision symbol within the HUD (which, indeed, I also love). This is absolutely above-average for its time.

Sound: -/10 Played it mostly muted and would probably give it at low rating based on what I heard (tho I do like the Tarzan yell), so I'll just pass on this one.

Play: 8/10 Frustrating albeit tight and consistent controls (like at first I thought catching the vines or jumping off them were clunky which they are of course, but once u get a hang of them they are indeed very consistent in that you simply have to be precise). It was addicting at first and I felt like I was having a good time--then I had a phase of wanting to step away from the game because I was trying not to use a guide or savestates since it's only a 20 minute timer--then I overall enjoyed playing the game with a guide ha. I almost quit it, but the fact that I returned, the year it came out, and the fact I have a bunch of handwritten notes and arrows and directions and scribbles means, tbh I really did enjoy the game even if it was a bit of a chore at times. PS I only learned this through watching a playthrough video when frustrated and about to give up that night, but you can jump on the crocodiles' tip of head instead of waiting for them to close like I had for most of it. Maybe the ending wouldn't have been so stressful had I know that, maybe a replay some day.

Feel: 8/10 When I first started the game, since it has such a short timer (20 minutes), I figured I had no right to a savestate or guide. Welp, I learned otherwise. Definitely more enjoyable with a guide ha (and a notebook imo). In many ways, the challenge gets old after a while--screen after screen, the same opening pit that sometimes makes you wait, sometimes you can hurry and jump, and sometimes you can jump over it with a rope. K got it. At least I had a bit of a learning curve story with the crocodile heads, but otherwise... not much unique in those mechanics. And because of this vibe, by the last 3rd of the game, it felt more like a chore to get 100% completion than fun. But by having a timer, and obviously being innovative as a platformer, this game "works": it is best played chaotically and as trial and error with the timer constraining (and then reference a guide after you lose your mind). I felt it just wasn't engaging enough to push through, but after all, I did push through. So, in the end, I grew to respect the game. I never could deny that it was huge for its time (which is both good and bad, I suppose) and open-world with alternative routes. In many ways, this game is overwhelming but all the more respectable because of it.

Attachment: 7/10 Even though I could definitely see myself replaying this, just because of the tediousness of much of it (again, despite the 20 minute timer...) and overall journey of playing it, it'll only be because of my desire to re-experience its unique atmosphere that I will replay it. The look and overall game are good, but too frustrating and tedious to be an 8+.

Pitfall is likely the very first game I ever played on a console.

Ironically enough, it was also a perfect metaphor for my life at the time. It was the early to mid 90s, and I was a very little girl in a very unstable environment. My mother worked constantly and I spent most of my time with my grandparents (whom I loved dearly), while my father continued to search for us, after threatening to send my mother home in a body bag and allowing me to fall down a flight of stairs when I was even younger, forever granting me lingering back problems. I didn't get along with anyone at school, and I mostly kept to myself and read storybooks or watched cartoons. My autism was not yet a discussion, despite obvious signs such as wanting the tags cut out of all my shirts and being unable to have different food on the same plate in case they touched. I was having a myriad of health problems, along with my back pain, including my asthma, dental and more. Needless to say, things weren't great.

But my mother had somehow obtained an Atari, and so I wound up playing video games often, but the one I always enjoyed the most was Pitfall.

Pitfall, for the uninitiated, is a game made by David Crane wherein you play as a little man named Pitfall Harry, who is tasked with collecting all the treasures within the jungle in 20 minutes while avoiding all of the obstacles that intend to do him harm; snakes, scorpions, alligators and more. Essentially, your job is to avoid these things and survive long enough to gather all the treasures and win the game. Despite it sounding easy as pie, rest assured, it's actually anything but. Even as an adult I've never managed to beat this game, and I still load it up in emulators quite regularly. You'd be surprised, as well, how much fun something so simplistic can still be too.

But it resonated with me in large part because it felt very much like what my life was at the time. Constantly avoiding downfalls by things trying to hurt me. Adults were fighting over me, kids were picking on me, and I had no real sense of identity, no self esteem and was almost certain that any day now something horrible would befall me and end my life. And it almost did.

When I was very little, I wound up getting extremely sick. I was so sick and lacked any energy at all that I couldn't drink, which meant I became so dehydrated my mother took me to the hospital. I stayed there for months, missed a lot of school and was forced to watch The Lion King a million times a day. I eventually had to relearn how to walk because I'd been in bed for so long. Looking back on it now, I realize how close I actually came to dying. How close I almost fell into a snake pit myself. And yet, like Pitfall Harry, I managed to instead grab the swinging vine and hoist myself across to the next stretch of jungle. Was it worth it? That's debatable. In my case, anyway, there was no treasure to be had on the other end. Harry at least got riches. A near death experience is meant to bring one closer to life, generally, but leave it to me to be the outlier to such a situation. I always have to be different. Since then I've not only been majorly suicidal and tried on numerous occasions to end my life, but also extremely depressed about the fact that I didn't die when I had the chance and spared myself of all the pain that came later.

But I guess that's the lesson, isn't it? To keep running forward. I think that's why I like platformers. You've always progressing. Unlike Night In The Woods, where you run left instead of right, because Mae (and I relate to this entirely too much) is regressing, the sole purpose of a platformer is to continually go to the right, avoid the obstacles and make it to the end. Hopefully there's something worth it at the end for all your valiant efforts, but so far I haven't been very lucky enough to find out what that something might be.

My entire adolescence was spent avoiding things. Avoiding fights, avoiding abuse, avoiding myself if possible, and avoiding therapy which is ironic considering as a teenager I was finally diagnosed with Avoidance Personality Disorder, among a myriad of other things. See, I have such a history with making the wrong choice, with doing the wrong thing - albeit not purposefully - that I'm terrified of making any choice at all, so I don't. I avoid everything. I take a cue from the platformers, from Pitfall, and just avoid anything I can because I'd rather not deal with the consequences. Is this a healthy way to live? Not one bit. And I'm working on that, I have been for years, and I've gotten much better I'm pleased to say, but it's still, and always will be somewhat, a thing.

Pitfall is a neat little game. It's simple, it's basic, it's surprisingly fun considering it's both of those things, but more than anything else it's a metaphor.

If you just keep jumping, swinging, dodging...you will survive long enough to reach the end.

And the end just might be worth it.